Are Bajans living in an emotionally unbalanced culture?
Bajans are generally pleasant, but we aren’t always the nicest, As we like to say…
“I good, til ya get pun my bad-side” which is understandable, but sometimes it doesn’t take much for that to happen, and all too often, something misconstrued easily turns into a bitter argument and we can’t seem to think clearly, we become irrational, Illogical, angry, and some even become physically aggressive. For too long, our inability to properly manage our emotions have been negatively impacting our society and culture, one strata that definitely feel it the most is early child development.
As an adult, I’ve witnessed my fair share of Bajans become emotionally aggressive towards children, and in my day I’ve sometimes been on the receiving end. These aggressions often masquerade under the guise of “strict discipline”, Bajans know them well, as children, we’ve heard them when we were growing up…
“Shut you mout in hey!”
“Wha you crying fuh? You want something tuh cry fah!?”
“You best get this right, or I gine buss yah tail!”
“You foolish!?”
“Stop confusing me child!”
To a born and bred Bajan, these might seem “normal” but next to proper English these words take on a completely different tone.
“Shut you mout in hey!” Stop speaking immediately
“Wha you crying fuh? You want something to cry fah!?” I don’t think you should be crying, I can hit you extremely hard, then you’ll have a real reason to cry.
“You best get this right, or I gine buss yah tail!” If you make a mistake I’m going to give you a severe beating.
“You foolish?” Are you stupid?
“Stop confusing me child!” Stop asking me questions, you are annoying me.
If you think about Barbados’ early days, all de way back to slavery, imagine the trauma that our Bajan fore-parents experienced and passed down to their children, grands, and great-grans. Wouldn’t it be fair to assume that the descendants of those early Bajans have been perpetuating that trauma? 180 years of slavery, followed by 132 years of colonialism, and 55 years of independence, that’s 367 years, roughly 20 generations of a people who never properly address their psychological issues, this is one of the many reasons why many of us carry around so much pain and anger.
This is also why alcohol consumption is a favorite pastime for many Bajans. In the words of the great soca artist Contone… “I like drinking rum, what I like tuh do? Drink nuff rum”. A catchline that resonates deeply and spans many generations of Barbadians, he also said… “Hardtimes hit me, I gine and drink someting now”. Though It’s true that many Bajans experience financially difficult times, I think the bulk of us suffer from the emotionally difficult ones.
Bajans like to say… “If ya doan laugh, ya would cry”, but why are we so afraid to cry, and more importantly, why aren’t we trying to identify those problems that make us feel like crying? “If ya doan laugh, ya would cry” so we, “like tuh drink nuff rum” to mask the pain for a short time, back to work, then time to mask up again. Mask on, mask off, a chronic cycle, perpetuated across lifetimes and continually passed down to Bajan children generation after generation.
Is our society in an emotional state of emergency?
Are we content to continue living with undiagnosed trauma?
Is it a problem our government needs to prioritize?
Just my 2 cents. Your opinion is always welcomed below.